The Thirteen Drinks of Halloween 2020 – Eight

Episode 8 of The Thirteen Drinks of Halloween finds our hero facing an overripe orange that must be juiced with only an old school hand reamer. Hilarity ensues as we stand and make Satan’s Whiskers. 

Goethe said “It is in self limitation that the master shows himself.” I don’t claim to be a master, but I decided to limit myself for this drink. Why? Because I am lazy. You see I decided to make this drink at mom and dad’s house because I had the ingredients, but I neglected to grab my roll of tools. I could have run home and grabbed them, but where would the fun in that be? The good news is you can easily make drinks at home without most of the cool tools. A mason jar can stand in for a shaker, a small measuring cup works for a jigger, you get the picture. Luckily, they have several cobbler shakers, that’s the single unit style with built in strainer, so I was able to show Liam why I don’t like them. 

Grab a shaker or a mason jar and pop in 1 ounce of gin, I used St. George Terroir and 1/2 an ounce of Grand Marnier. Next add 1 ounce of orange juice, painfully acquired using only a hand reamer and determination, 1 ounce of sweet vermouth, 1 ounce of dry vermouth and 2 stabs of Regan’s Orange Bitters. Add ice and shake well to the beat of “Sympathy for the Devil”, a song that I had to explain, at great length, to the boy yesterday, as we explored the historical references and the complexity of Lucifer’s relationship with God, paying special attention to Obi-Wan’s particular points of view theory. When your drink is well chilled, fight to get the top to release and strain through that crappy little strainer into a chilled coupe. Try to not wince at the orange pulp falling into the drink. Garnish with a beautifully dehydrated orange coin and serve. 

This is one of those classic cocktails suitably named for our seasonal purposes. It is tasty enough, everything works well and it is nicely balanced. I would definitely serve this one on the Halloween menu. It’s a proper cocktail and I like that. 
If I had been more clever or thought of it half an hour ago I would have garnished this with some nice slivers of cayenne, curled to make hot whiskers, but I only thought of that now, when the drink is but a memory. You could try it, though. It might be nice. Another variation is to make this with orange curaçao for Satan’s Curly Whiskers. I’d be surprised if most folks could tell the difference, but maybe you run with a more sophisticated crowd of palates than I do. Actually, that’s pretty likely, but I hope you enjoy the beverage anyway. Stay safe, stay hydrated and stay spooky, my friends.